No Rock And Roll Fun

GET INTO BRITNEY'S UNDI... WHAT, WE'VE USED THAT HEADLINE BEFORE?: Huh. Well, this time, it's going on a story about various celebrities designing corsets in aid of a rape-incest charity. Amongst the people who've picked up a pen and done some colouring in are Olivia Newton John (would actually work well for a wedding night); Cyndi Lauper; Tori Amos (turns you into a giant bee with a pinched in waistline; probably best for a bloke to wear so he can do a gag about his stinger); Britney Spears (we're guessing she got some help with hers) and The Scissor Sisters (a big pair of scissors. Went home early, then). The best is designed by Courtney Cox and David Arquette, which at first we thought showed that sexy gear is best designed by people who fool around with each other, but then we realised it was Courtney Cox, who wouldn't need to wear a corset because the whalebone would be clanking together before it even started to bite round her Ryvita-craving body.