MAYBE IT WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER TO CALL IN SICK

Not since Roseanne's attempt has a national anthem gone down quite so badly as John Michael Montgomery's bash at the Golden Corral 500 Nascar race in Atlanta.

He appeared to be drunk; couldn't remember the words so tried to read them off the back of his laminate pass; fell off the stage and - horror of horrors - kept his hat on throughout.

But it turns out he wasn't pissed - just ill. He takes off his hat and explains:

"Everyone has good days and bad days and it's no different for singers. Unfortunately, my bad day was televised.

"Based on lack of information, many of you assumed that my less-than-perfect performance was alcohol related, and I understand how it may have appeared that way. Let me explain why.

"I have been diagnosed with a condition known as acoustic neuroma, which can seriously affect my hearing and balance. The unsteadiness in me that you saw was my vertigo and lack of balance.

"Better judgment might have been to notify the promoters instead of trying to perform the anthem. However, due to my contractual obligation, I decided to go ahead with the performance. In hindsight, I shouldn't have. Please accept my sincerest apologies for offending anyone, it was certainly not my intention."

We're not quite sure how vertigo would wipe the words of your national anthem from your mind; or, indeed, make you not take your hat off. You'd assume, of course, if you had such a condition, it would manifest itself at many performances. We await reports from people who've seen JMM's acoustic neuroma manifest itself in the past.

music john michael montgomery