THE LOW COMEDY WRITES ITSELF

It's such a hostage to fortune, we won't even bother to say the obvious response to the news that Mariah Carey has compared herself to her dog. Let's instead give her some credit, and examine exactly what she meant:

"He's a kid and so am I. He gets frightened of crowds of people. He gets delusional. I may believe in Santa, but I'm not delusional."

Leaving aside the question of how anyone can be in their early 40s and believe in Santa (did she mean Jesus?) we want to know what makes her think her dog is delusional? Actually, more to the point, what makes her think that she isn't? Unless - and it's just possible - that all those babbling postings to her website were actually done by the dog?

music mariah carey