BAND MELTDOWN

We haven't had a chance to go through Revelations yet, but we're convinced that there's something in it about how - just prior to the whore of Babylon and the chaps on horses, we should be keeping an eye open for the crumbling of a billion vapid bands. And, lo, it's coming to pass: both Cookie and Phixx shed members in the last thirty-six hours or so.



Phixx have shed Nikk, who may or may not have been the gay "one" out of Phixx. He'd been holding on in the vain hope that there might have been another seventeen series of Hit Me Baby One More Time, by which time they'd have been so desperate for contestants they'd have been letting virtually anyone on.

Cookie have had to come to terms with Nicola Ward deciding she can't take it any more; she's returned to work with Audrey at the salon. Nicola first shot to, uh, her status on one of the Pop Idol/Star type shows, and she seems from the Cookie websites to have been the most popular of the band, although that doesn't really say very much. Happily, she's chosen to quit while the band are supporting girls aloud on tour and seventeen days before they're due to release their single. Luckily, after an exhaustive audition process ("what's yer dress size?"), they've found someone called Aimie Flack to replace her. So, like, nobody will notice.

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