GUESS WHO WASN'T GOING TO DINNER?

There's perhaps one of the most confusing political spats of all time currently under way in Israel, where the Foreign Minister, his wife, the ambassador to Washington and his wife seem to be involved in some sort of childish point-scoring that dates back to when Madonna was in Israel last year. Maddy was there to promote tourism to the country - we believe the slogan was 'who was Rachel Corrie, again?' - and Judy Nir-Moses, the wife of the foreign minister really wanted to meet her. Only she wasn't invited. It set off a chain of such ill-feeling that Danny Ayalon, the Israeli ambassador (or "bloke who picks up the huge cheques from the White House", to give him his official title) somehow conspired to ensure that Foreign Minister Silvan Shalom missed out on an invite to nip in to see President Bush.

Good God, people - George Bush and Madonna? You're having a piss-battle over not getting the chance to hang out with two of the most crushing dullards of modern times? Any sane person would pretend to have to go to their dentist's funeral rather than have to make small talk with Madonna, while more than five minutes in Bush's company is enough to require half a day inside a conversational decompression chamber. Look at bloody Cheney - look at the eyes of a man who has no choice but to sit listening to Georgie chunter on for hour after hour. And you're complaining because you were spared that?

music madonna israel Danny Ayalon Judy Nir-Moses Silvan Shalom