THE REUNION NOBODY EXPECTED*

* - of course, everyone expected the Take That reunion, what we mean is nobody drew the precise day and time in the sweepstake we ran back in 1996 to predict the reunion. The prize will be rolled over for the Spice Girls reunion announcement.

Those lovely 3am Girls do have more than the look of Forrest Gump about them, and that might explain why they're keen to back project themselves into every event in history. Apparently, you see, it's the 3Am campaign which persuaded the boys to reunite rather than the millions of quid thrown onto the table. We know that Howard was thinking "well... the opportunity to eat for the first time since Diana's funeral is tempting, but I'm not signing anything unless I get a sign from the Daily Mirror", and we know that for a fact.

Meanwhile, Mike Griffiths brings Robbie's alternative plans to our attention - apparently, he's so excited by his roommate Jonathan Wilkes getting a role in panto, he's going to get involved too. Robbie will appear on video tape doing some stuff with Ant and Dec:

An insider told the Daily Mirror: "It is an extremely funny video clip which lasts a few minutes."

"Robbie's part is absolutely integral to the story and it's very, very funny," he continued, "He might put on a daft dress, he could be a dame or even pop up as a fairy. Whatever he does it will be worth watching."

We're not entirely sure how this insider can say that it's a funny clip if he doesn't actually know what Williams will be doing in it. But let's just look more closely at the heart of that quote:

"He might put on a daft dress, he could be a dame or even pop up as a fairy."

It just writes itself, doesn't it?

Those Take That dates in full, then:

Newcastle Metro Radio Arena - April 24th
Birmingham NEC - April 27th & 28th
Glasgow SECC - April 30th
Sheffield Hallam FM Arena - May 2nd
Manchester MEN Arena - May 5th & 6th
London Wembley Arena - May 8th & 9th
Dublin The Point - May 23rd
Belfast Odyssey - May 24th

In other stuff from that exciting press conference yesterday, Gary Barlow gave the impression that the reunion has been stirred by a Consumer Association style rage at the lack of value for money on other topline tours:

"We've watched a lot of other pop band's tours over the past couple of years and I don't think people get value for money out of them."

Jason added: "Madonna and Robbie Williams are the only two great entertainers out there."

Bless little Jason - we bet that Madonna shows do look really great when you're watching them on a 12" black and white telly eating cold baked beans.

Since it's clear that Take That reuniting is perhaps the most important cultural event since, ooh, the last Girls Aloud appearance on CD:UK, we'll track all the coverage here:

Take That: Back For Good Money index

16-11-05 Robbie Williams will come to no good, reckons manager
18-11-05 Mark Owen is everyone's favourite
25-11-05 Victoria Newton - It was the Sun wot done it
26-11-05 3AM: It was the Mirror wot done it [This page]
27-11-05 It's Lulu
03-12-05 The 30 minute sellout
13-12-05 Williams sniffs round the boys
17-12-05 Lulu: the shocking truth
18-12-05 Nigel Martin-Smith makes a tactical withdrawal
04-01-06 Mark Owen seeks boy to be his butt
17-01-06 Will Young offers to take Robbie's slot
11-03-06 Howard suggests there's more to come
26-03-06 Don't throw your back out for good, Gary
30-03-06 Hello, Wembley Milton Keynes
14-04-06 The Sun promises Robbie for Manchester
24-04-06 First Night: Newcastle
25-04-06 Robbie's repeated comebacks
09-05-06 And now it's an album
19-06-06 People wind up in hospital


Funnily enough, you can still get hold of the original greatest hits package for a lot less money than the broadly similar new one - although Amazon are listing it as "not yet published." Hmm...

music take that robbie williams mark owen gary barlow howard donald jason orange