BONO'S FRIENDS

You might have thought that Bono spent his evenings sat in the lounge with the lights off, wondering how it is that he's come to be George Bush's spokesperson. But no, financial trader Bono is quite chipper about being so close to the No Child Left Unbombed president:

“We have had lots of rows and we have denounced the Bush administration when they have made mistakes, but we're not placarding and throwing rotten tomatoes at people who are trebling our aid to Africa.”

Now, we here at No Rock are quite close followers of Bono and his doings, and we're a little surprised to hear about these 'denunciations' of the White House – we remember a little gentle chiding of the Canadian Premier, but we seem to have missed something as serious as a denunciation of George W Bush. Perhaps it was a private denunciation, which would hardly be to denounce at all.

After all, Bono does tend to give Bush a really easy ride – take, for example, that bit about Bush "trebling our aid to Africa" (interesting use of the word 'our' there – is Bono speaking as an American citizen or a member of the Bush administration?). Who says that Bush has trebled US Aid to Africa? Not many people, apart from Bush himself – unfortunately, it's simply not true. Independent research by the Brooking Institution has discovered that by the time you look at what Bush pledged, what Congress actually signed off on, and what proportion of that has been spent, and take into account the Bush administration pretending Clinton's spending was lower than it actually was, there's been at best a 56% increase in actual aid money being spent. And a big chunk of that was emergency food aid, rather than funds for development.

Bono's generous decision to go with what Bush says he's doing rather than judging him on his actions is what one would expect from a friend; and this friendliness is returned by the White House, who are able to use Bono's frequent and fulsome praise as "evidence" of how generously they're treating the developing world – for they must be, because Bono would surely never praise empty gestures, would he? It's a virtuous circle, in which everyone wins. (Okay, maybe not any Africans win, but it's a hard world, isn't it?)

There is just one question, though: if Bono is quite so relaxed about his love-ins with Bush, and if – as he likes to claims – his trips up Pennsylvania Avenue are designed to keep global attention on George and to act as his conscience, then why is Bono so tetchy about being photographed with him? According to the White House News Photographer's Association:

the White House released a photo of President Bush meeting with Bono of U2. When questioned why photographers were excluded, the White House response was that Bono’s people did not want press coverage.

Perhaps he was afraid that independent photographs might reveal something he'd rather keep hidden, like traces of Bush's colon on the tip of Bono nose?

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