Wednesday, February 08, 2006


Having pleaded guilty to multiple possession charges, Pete Doherty has bodyswerved jail and been given a twelve month community order.

Part of it means that Doherty has to go on a drugs rehab programme - although quite where the State feels it can succeed where the combined efforts of some Tibetan monks, Dot Cotton off Eastenders, Carl Barat, Kate Moss, the richest doctors in Arizona, stomach implants, Alan McGee and the goodwill of thousands of fans have failed isn't clear.

Doherty's brief threw a successful plea to the magistrates: think of the fans, man:

"Pete Doherty has asked me to point out another reason he is in the public eye is that people derive enjoyment and are entertained by him. These people are his fans and he is happiest when he's playing his guitar to others. He wants to repay their loyalty and support by coming through this at the other end as a successful and talented musician."

It's interesting to hear that Pete's happiest when he's playing his guitar. It must have been a bugger all those times he was too gently automonged to even turn up at the gigs; nevermind how frustrated he must have felt having to put the set on hold while he went looking for spoons.

If Doherty doesn't stay clean - and he has to have a monthly drug test - he could still end up inside.


Eyetie said...

GCSE Pop Music, Summer 2006
After killing off the Libertines, joining a less-talented outfit, cancelling numerous gigs, burgling his band mate's flat, moaning about his love for a celebrity twiglet, refusing to take rehab seriously no matter what form it came in and releasing an album with had less decent songs than a Libertine EP, Pete wanted to repay your loyalty by:

(a) giving you the cash for the wasted trips and time taken to gigs he didn't play
(b) releasing new material which was noted for its content rather than its author
(c) reforming the Libertines (if Carl would have him back) OR
(d) making an impossible promise to fans of "coming through this at the other end as a successful and talented musician."

Yeah, cheers, Pete.

Anonymous said...

Pfft. If the Pete Doherty fans I've met are any indication they don't want him off drugs, because drugs give him his magical insight into what makes the world tick, like bad puns, tedious hints at homosexual dalliances and sub-Larkin "poetic" imagery. The only way they'd want him to give up drugs is through death, so they can instantly erect an unholy monument of a death cult to him.

Anonymous said...

If he manages to get past the second test I'll fuck my boots.


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