THE SPICE GIRLS TOUR: OFF

There never has been a Spice Girls tour. Mel C has repeatedly made it clear that it wouldn't happen. There never was going to be a Spice Girls tour. And yet The Sun is claiming an exclusive on its cancellation.

Still, there's "a source close to the girls" to report:

“She wants to concentrate on solo work. She met with Victoria, who was thinking the same thing. Posh is now heavily into fashion and realised the Spice tour had the potential to be a PR disaster.

“The girls would be compared to the amazing TAKE THAT comeback."

Yes, the amazing Take That comeb... hang about, how do you know it's amazing? It hasn't happened yet. Gary Barlow might insist on wearing a codpiece and Robbie Williams might turn up.

And we love the idea that Posh thinks the sort of people who might buy her garish jeans and kiddie-style sunglasses would be put off by a shit Spice Girls reunion. ("We could just about take the solo records, but this...")

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