CONGRESS TO CHASE ARCTIC MONKEYS OUT OF SCHOOL

It's not that Republican Congressman Michael G. Fitzpatrick is really that bothered by the thought of American youth being corrupted by the Arctic Monkeys, it's all those online predators stalking MySpace which has led him to introduce a bill designed to block under-18s from accessing MySpace on school and library computers.

That's going to be a tough one for Fox News - we know how much they love a paedopanic over there, but what will they do when one of their beloved hyper-religious Congressional heroes introduces a bill aimed at choking another part of Murdoch's empire?

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