Thursday, July 13, 2006

CHILD ABUSE

We could say something about Chris Hardman, a teenager who appeared on Alice Cooper's Rock School series, being given a record contract (supposedly half a million's worth, but we know how vague those figures can be), but we think that the analysis it deserves might leave him feeling he had to call Childline.

Mind you, we would just be rolling our eyes. We're not sure there's words for the sort of guff RCA are spitting out as they prepare to squeeze a profit from him:

“Little Chris is best described as a grown-up Bart Simpson after he discovered rock music.

“He has a massive personality. He’s like a cartoon character in a good way.”


Interesting comparison - Bart Simpson did release a single in The Simpsons, a novelty track ('I Didn't Do This' to the tune of Superfreak) before the public tired of him; in the real world there was a very brief Simpsons musical bubble which burst almost as soon as "Bart" had a number one. If RCA are drawing parallels with the scion of the Simpsons family, let's hope the newsagent keeps Chris' paperround open for him.


5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hey!!! I had that Simpsons album. On tape. New. Oh God, I feel so old now :(

Still, it's a great album. "Do the Bartman" possibly Michael Jackson's greatest work IMHO even if it appears he didn't write it!

Kevin

Anonymous said...

Ah, its so easy to confuse one slap encrusted american rawk fossil with another. Alice Cooper? Gene Simmons? Who cares?

simon h b said...

Unless they have Sharon Osbourne attached, they become interchangeable.

Anonymous said...

its GENE SIMMONS butthead. Get your info correct. Alice Cooper had nothng to do with Rock School

simon h b said...

Anonymous...

It's what we call a "joke" - precisely, "confusing for comic effect."

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