Sharon O, dear

The people who are charged with making Sharon Osbourne's chat show for the now-defunct ITV network are trying to put a brave face on the viewing figures: after all, she did hit two million sometimes. Trouble is, though, the show performed best in its last five minutes, when people switched on early for the news.

Still, there's the hint for the future: make the programmes five minutes long.

A Talkback Thames spokeswoman defended the ratings.

"The Sharon Osbourne Show consistently doubles its audience from its lead-in show and grows throughout the hour and throughout the final minutes."

The Sharon Osbourne show does double the audience from the programme before it. But, erm, that's usually a children's programme.

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