Noel ain't too proud to beg

James McCabe drops us an email, alerting to us to Noel Gallagher's dignity-free attempt to muscle-in on the Glasto bill. The man's always been one of those people who think that the world will welcome them if they turn up, unannounced, with their guitar. Now, it's starting to get Messianistic:

"Playing the acoustic stuff at the festivals, that would be good. "Actually, Glastonbury acoustic tent sounds nice! That would be good. Yeah, do us a favour stick that in and Mr Eavis will give me a call!"

"Saying that he'd probably put me on at the same time as Arctic Monkeys," mused Gallagher. "The best slot is second on the bill on the Other Stage. I've never had that slot at Glastonbury, but we've done it at foreign festivals and it's great."

Now, this deserves some serious thought. Noel... at Glastonbury. Muddy shoes. Lots of mud. Runny, sloppy mud... like chocolate pudding. Lemur hungry! Lemur want chocolate!