Tobago homophobo no-no

Elton John's planned headlining of a gig in the 19th century ("Tobago") has caused festering nonsense to start issuing from Philip Isaac, the Archdeacon of Trinidad and Tobago:

He said: "His visit to the island can open the country to be tempted towards pursuing his lifestyle."

What... fresh flowers every day, elaborate parties and guest appearances with Pete Doherty? Imagine if the whole of Tobago adopted that - there wouldn't be enough vases, apart from anything else. Vase shortages.

Oh... hang on, it's the gay thing, isn't it?

The Archdeacon condemned Sir Elton's marriage to David Furnish, saying it doesn't conform to "biblical teachings" because a "man should not lie with a man".

Standing up against a wall, or that position on all fours like you're doing star-jumps - that should be okay.
Organisers of the Plymouth Jazz Festival are choosing to pretend that Isaac is just a rogue churchman.

We wonder what the Anglican church makes of it all.