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Gordon in the morning
It looks like Gordon's firmly back behind the Bizarre desk after his trip abroad, as we get Keira Knightley half-undressed, for another publication, for the second day running; a whole bunch of I'd rather go naked than wear fur shoots - which Gordon calls "the latest trend" despite having been running for over a decade; and there's coverage of Renee Zellweger's dress at the Bee Movie premiere and a prominent place for a collection of pictures of celebrities without pants on, which is made more bizarre by the decision to put a big star over the "evidence". So it's a photo showing people not wearing pants, only obscured so you can't see they're not wearing pants. I see.
Oh, and there's also a story - which Smart appears to have lifted entirely from an Australian newspaper - which claims Britney Spears is threatening to let us all watch video of Paris Hilton and her together - a "lesbo" video, as Smart charmingly calls it - after the pair fell out. So it's not only a totally made-up story, but one that some other newspaper has made up in the first place. Good work, Gordon.
3 comments:
The best bit is that the Britney/Paris story was reported two days ago by those red-hot showbiz investigators at Digital Spy. And they quoted the source as being, um, the Daily Star. Which would suggest that the Star got hold of the story some time on Tuesday.
So Gordon's now reporting stories which have appeared in England then travelled to the other side of the world. What's the carbon footprint like on that? Is this the tabloid equivalent of a kiwi fruit which takes more than its weight in airline fuel to get here?
can you imagine if someone wrote about men in this way. They'd probably get lynched.
It's articles like this that make you wish for the good old days of Newton. I can't believe I even typed that. Oh look a pig flying past my window!
I like the way it took him three days to realise that a daily photo of a woman's breasts in the run-up to Christmas could be called a 'Ladvent Calendar'. They don't call him 'Smart' for nothing.
Well, I say 'it took him three days'. Chances are it was the work-experience boy from the mail-room tapping him on the shoulder in the urinals and saying "Hey, you know those girlie photos you put in every day? I've just thought what you could call them..."
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