Gordon in the morning: Yes, yes, Virgin, tee-hee

Gordon giggles with delight this morning, as Russell Brand may-or-may-not have had sex with an air hostess who works for Branson's airline:

Now Brand beds a Virgin

Do you see what he did there?

Actually, what has he done there? Just because you work for Virgin doesn't make you a Virgin, either in fact or in title. Gordon's not a News International, is he? If you had a relationship with a burger bar manager, you wouldn't think "well, now I've had sex with a McDonalds", would you?

Mind you, at least you can see what he was trying to get at, which is more than you can say for the headline on the report about the NME Awards:

Klaxons gong-goed in States

What? What does that even think it's meant to mean?

Smart then manages to miss what you'd thought would have been the most important part of the evening for him - when Ronson joined the stage invasion and fell over, he said "this'll be in The Sun tomorrow, won't it?" Somehow, Gordon managed to miss it.