Burns gets a million

Pete Burns is going to be granted compensation for the botched lip job which turned his already surprising mouth into a source of pain and weeping. The Mail is confidently predicting it'll be a million quid, before, at the bottom of the story, admitting it's guessing:

[T]he exact value of Mr Burns’s claim, will be decided at a High Court hearing next March. A spokesman for Mr Burns’s solicitors Irwin Mitchell said: ‘We do not wish to comment at this stage.’

Burns is claiming that the botched operation harmed his career as well as his health, although that might be a bit of a stretch - how many series of Living TV fly-on-the-wall shows did it cost him, really?

[Recommended: Clive James on Pete Burns from Radio 4's A Point Of View]