Do Hello! own a map?

Or even the slightest grasp of American geography?:

New mum Billie Piper, who's been enjoying a two-week family break in Miami with her husband Laurence Fox and their two-month-old son Winston, made the most of the US jaunt by popping over to Hollywood.

"Popping over"? From Miami to Los Angeles? Four and a half thousand miles?

Never ask if a Hello journalist could pop down the shops to pick up some milk - they'd head off to Syria or somewhere.