Monday, January 12, 2009

Gordon in the morning: Get out the way, Gordon, it's the Globes

Gordon's column has been bulldozed this morning, with large swathes of his online column being shoved aside to make room for Golden Globes coverage. Does this - reportage, with actual, checkable facts, really fit in the Bizarre column? If Gordon does have a regular readership for the sort of thing he usually does, why would you suddenly dump some news in front of them instead?

In the paper version of Bizarre, the big story is a claim that Leona Lewis and Justin Timberlake are going to "duet on Whitney's classic song". At least online Dolly Parton is given the proper credit for I Will Always Love You.

Meanwhile, in the latest churning Mrs Winehouse's Holiday coverage, Gordon is forced to embrace the News Of The World:

Amy told our sister paper the News Of The World: “Josh is handsome and clean and that’s what I love about him."

The Sun having to concede that it was scooped by the NOTW? That's going to hurt. Especially since Smart is now having to follow the Screws' line:
[Mitch Winehouse] will comfort Amy, 25, said to be distraught at his departure.

A source said: “She has been calling Mitch every day to tell him she is totally besotted.

Mitch wants him to know he will have their support.”

This is a bit of a swing from the way Gordon confidently informed his readers last Wednesday there was no romance between the pair.

Still, you can't go wrong with Globes coverage, can you? Alison Maloney files confidently:
SACHA BARON COHEN shocked the audience at the Golden Globes with gags about POSH, CHARLIE SHEEN and MADONNA.

Shocked, you say?
The Borat star, presenting the Best Comedy award, drew gasps as he said; “The recession is affecting all of us, even movie stars.

“VICTORIA BECKHAM hasn’t eaten for three weeks, Charlie Sheen has been forced to have sex without paying for it.

“And even Madonna has had to let one of her personal assistants go. Our thoughts go out to you, GUY RITCHIE!”

Isn't that one gag, rather than "gags"? And that really "shocked" people, did it? Perhaps Alison means it in the sense of 'shocked that his material was so thin'.


1 comment:

Spence said...

“VICTORIA BECKHAM hasn’t eaten for three weeks, Charlie Sheen has been forced to have sex without paying for it.

“And even Madonna has had to let one of her personal assistants go. Our thoughts go out to you, GUY RITCHIE!”

I like to think he shouted the names out as is implied in the article (why do the tabloids do that????)

But why no capitals for CHARLIE SHEEN? Not tabloid-friendly enough?

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