Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Gordon in the morning: This charming man

Now, generally, I'm not a big fan of Abi Titmuss. But does she really deserve the headline that Gordon's put on the story about Mickey Rourke's supposed attempts to spend some time with her:

Slapper smacks down grappler

Slapper? Really, Gordon? You think it's ever appropriate for a family newspaper to call someone a slapper?

We're also treated to Gordon's thinking-words on the occasion of the Grammy-BAFTA night:
THE country might be awash with economic gloom but we can take huge pride in the success of our film and music industry.

COLDPLAY, ADELE, ROBERT PLANT, DUFFY and ESTELLE proudly flew the flag for the UK, pocketing a brilliant 15 Grammys on Sunday night.

Back home our actors, directors and talented army of film makers gave Britain one of our proudest Bafta nights ever.

Best bit for me was Orange Rising winner Noel Clarke, 33, who issued a rallying call to teenagers insisting if he could make a success of himself, then anyone could follow in his footsteps.

Our music and film industries are without any question packed with Great Britons.

Apparently, you can create this editorial for yourself simply by humming the Dambusters theme into one of those headsets that change voice into text.

So, how great is the British film industry at creating stars, Gordon? Your three stories from the BAFTA aftershows are that one with Abi Titmuss and Mickey Rourke; one about Pitt and Jolie rushing off and one about Sharon Stone not being able to hail a taxi. Funny, isn't it? This great night for British stars, and yet - apart from Abi, of course - Gordon's only interested in the Americans.


2 comments:

Chris said...

Well, Abi kind of did become famous as a result of a British film...

Anonymous said...

"Our music and film industries are without any question packed with Great Britons."

I think my head is about to explode due to it being completely baffled. When he says "our" industries he presumably, given the tone of the "article", means "British" industries. So is he saying the British music and film industries are packed with British people? What exactly is he trying to say? Since when was this under question?


"Back home our actors, directors and talented army of film makers gave Britain one of our proudest Bafta nights ever."

Besides the fact that British people winning British awards is about as surprising as Coldplay are exciting, would we really say that there was much pride to be had? He mentions actors. Only one of the four acting awards went to a Brit. Despite large numbers of exceptionally talented people in this country's unappreciated and underfunded animation industry, the UK didn't even have a nomination for best animated film (I don't think there was one produced last year). Well I suppose maybe Gordon is proud of that. I mean who wants poncey actors and cartoons (they're for kids, you know) messing up his DANNY DYER films. Not the sort of thing he wants to discuss down the pub with GUY RITCHIE. Look TITS!

Like you say, it's interesting how little interest the newspaper shows for the British film industry when it comes to writing fluff to sell papers. Come next week will they have articles about Noel Clarke? That's about as likely as them admitting that this was just an excuse to wave that flag for their own political reasons.

(Oh and I got more of a Land of Hope and Glory from the piece than Dambusters.)

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