Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Beatles industry reports sighting of some fools still with money; plots separation operation

As if the disappointing sales of the CDs and the underwhelming performance of the computer game wasn't enough, the Beatles industry intends to carry on churning out overwrought, unnecessary stuff:

The Beatles Box Of Vision® is the deluxe companion to the newly re-mastered Beatles CDs, and will be available as the ultimate Beatles gift in the UK and Europe this Christmas from www.[a website].com and www.[a website].com, plus select retailers.

"Select retailers" - I suspect self-selecting, as most, surely, would have declined this package:
Officially licensed by The Beatles’ Apple Corps Ltd., the stunning collection, previously only available in North America, includes the following Beatles’ collectible content: The first book in the box is the LP Sized Album Artwork Book includes 200 pages of the Beatles’ LP artwork – the first time all the Beatles’ UK and US album artwork has been collected together in one LP sized book. The Album Artwork book includes front and back covers, gatefolds, inserts and the complete LP booklets from Magical Mystery Tour and many more.

The second book, ‘The Catalography’, is an extensive, all-new, full-colour guide jam-packed with photos, text and track-listings providing the first-ever side-by-side presentation of the U.K. albums and their U.S. counterparts.

The third book is entitled the ‘The Box of Vision Storage Book’ – a highly collectible, unique and stylish way for Beatles fans to organize and display all 32 discs of The Beatles’ core catalog. Beatles fans will have the opportunity to insert CDs and booklets from their existing Beatles collections or the recently released digitally re-mastered versions.

So, it's a book you put the CDs in (or, rather, "have the opportunity" to put the CDs in), and then stick the booklets and artwork in, alongside another book which collects all the artwork and booklets in it.
Ideal for fans, collectors and Christmas gift giving, all three Beatles books are housed in an elegant black, linen-covered box with silver embossed Beatles logos and faux Beatles LP spines.

I love the way "Christmas gift giving" implies that this box is the sort of thing you could give to someone who falls neither into 'fans' or 'collectors' nevertheless.


6 comments:

Anonymous said...

That's a pretty cynical overview of the Beatles Box of Vision. This release is the perfect counterpart to the recent Beatles re-masters. I'll be buying it. Clever package. Love it.

Anonymous said...

The Fab Four immortalized in a Box. Why didn't I think of this? Brilliant. I must have it NOW.

Jon Polk said...

Simon-- it is very cynical of you! I generally love cynics, and often read your blog, but in this case you are off point! This product should actually restore your confidence that some people do stiil care about putting out a quality product that delivers value for the price. i know because i am that person. I am the creator of the BoxOfVision and i think when you see it in person you will understand. The LP art book alone is worth the price. I spent two years having all of the Beatles UK and US LP artwork color corrected, cleaned up and restored to create pristne ane gorgeous art prints that I can assure you Beatles fans LOVE. I have spent the past 6 months going to Beatles conventions, showing it off. I have sold close to 20 thousand copies around the world already, and have the letters and emails to show how much they appreciate and adore it. Can I send you one to try to turn you around?

duckie said...

Are you offering him a bribe Jon?

James said...

Personally I think magnums of Moet and Chandon are bloody awful.

Terrible stuff.

Anyone?

Will settle for case of Blue Nun.

Chris Brown said...

I'm afraid No Rock isn't much of a Beatles fan. But you can send it to me if you like, because I think the best place to see a Beatles cover is on the front of the record. Is there a blank page for the White Album?

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