You'll remember Russell Brand, won't you? It's only a year since The Sun was calling him "smuuty", "vile", "sick", "filthy", a "juvenile... overpaid twerp".
In short, then, he's the perfect man to guest-edit Bizarre.
Still, out of deference to the polite and family-friendly tit-publishing newspaper he's working for, Russell keeps it clean:
JEDWARD mania has given me a novel idea of how one could reunite OASIS - give the band a new name that's a combination of the Gallagher brothers' names.
NIAM or LOEL? Could that work?
Dull as a fishcake without the breadcrumbs, admittedly. But clean.