It's not just the big splash story on the Bizarre site this morning, but it gets the full "by Gordon Smart, showbiz editor" byline.
What revelation could be worthy of such attention?
Erm, that Wayne Rooney quite likes Grease.
Still, it allows Gordon to attempt to force some gender warfare down our throats:
That's a schoolboy error, Mr Rooney. It's a film for teenage girls.Because, naturally, that's what boys watch.
All of those years sharing a TV remote with Coleen must've affected his mind.
Bizarre HQ will raid the Christmas party piggybank and send him the Die Hard and Rocky box-sets immediately.