Brian May grumbles at lack of Brian May in Jubilee bunfight

Who can forget the Golden Jubilee, when Brian May stood on top of Buckingham Palace playing 'Look At Me, I'm Sandra Dee'?

Nobody can forget. Nobody can. Sometimes it might slip from your mind for a few seconds, but then Andrew Marr looms into your face, waving the video of the event: "It's evidence for how vital and amazing the Queen remains" enthuses Marr, "that she can have an actual rock star on the roof of the actual house she sometimes lives in. Isn't the Queen marvellous? She's marvellous. Like some sort of marvellous marvel - and she's cheap. If you had a president, it would cost three times as much, you know."

It's a little-known fact that May has remained on the Palace roof for the last ten years, surviving on energy bars lobbed up to him by Prince Harry. "I'm clearly going to be asked to stand on the roof and play 'I'm 'Enery The Eight I Am' to mark the Diamond Jubilee, so it's not worth coming down" May has explained.

But - oh dear - Gary Barlow, who has been put in charge of the "gig" - has chosen not to ask May to play. Not that May's bitter about it:

“No, we haven’t been asked at all which is a shame — maybe next time we will, perhaps the one after diamond, whatever that is,” May, 64, tells [The Telegraph's Tim Walker] at the Whatsonstage.com awards concert at the Prince of Wales Theatre.

“I don’t how they’re going to top the Golden Jubilee event we were involved with, but that’s Gary Barlow’s problem. They’ll have to drop him from a helicopter or something.”

Yeah, because that's the only way they'll top the bloke married to Angie Watts playing a guitar on a roof. There is literally no other way than tossing Gary Barlow out of a helicopter over the crowd, without a parachute, making him play the riff from the Hawaii Five-O theme tune.

Not that May's bitter - did we mention that he's not bitter? - because he's too busy elsewhere:

May says he is, in any case, pre-occupied with the sequel to the West End show We Will Rock You, a celebration of the music of his Queen rock group. “We have it written now,” he says. “I can’t tell you what it will be called, but it’s looking good – we’ve had input from Ben [Elton], who wrote the original and is like a member of the band now, so we talk all the time. We’re looking at where we can take it as it’s at production stages.”

Looking for somewhere to take a sequel to We Will Rock You? I think we can come up with a few ideas.