2014 Forever: September

U2 forced their crappy new album into every iTunes collection on the planet. Their acolytes struggled to explain why this was OK. God help us when Bono unveils his magic new format. Thom Yorke was experimenting with Bittorrent Bundles.

After his claim that being asleep can be an OK to sex, TBS dumped CeeLo Green. And Nicki Minaj's old school didn't want her back.

Miley Cyrus suggested that nobody threw a fit when Elvis danced sexy, which sort-of ignored the fact they did. She also said that social media is worse than drugs, and that's not true, either.

Frustratingly, James Blunt keeps doing things which make it difficult to dislike him. Surprisingly, Tatu keep finding new ways to make gay, lesbian, bisexual people and others dislike them.

The Mirror knew it wasn't Liam Payne naked but got excited anyway.

Someone in Slovakia muddled up Linkin Park and the Maltese anthem. Everyone muddled Tom Clarke up with Hobbits and he wasn't happy about that.

Maybe you were out of control, Chris Brown. "Maybe". Maybe. Maybe you were out of it when you made Blurred Lines, Robin Thicke. You're still a pair of cloacas, though.

Gary Barlow sort-of apologised for his tax avoidance. Jason Orange had had enough.

Rebranding: IPC to Time
Closing: The Leeds Cockpit; Williamsbburg Death By Audio; Liverpool Mello Mello

[Part of 2014 Forever]
[Previously: August]