WHEN EVERYTHING'S BEEN SAID AND DONE, ITV WILL MAKE A PROGRAMME ABOUT IT

We can't help wondering if the price for Sharon Osbourne's involvement in the new series of The X-Factor (oh, yes, they're making another one) was anything to do with the announcement of an ITV 'tribute' to Ozzy Osbourne. It sounds, well, can we say fascinating?

The former BLACK SABBATH star will be joined by his famous family on the show, which will feature details of his near-fatal quad bike accident, and stories about his notorious alcohol and drug abuse.

So, pretty much the same material that's been recycled from colour supplement to celeb mag to website over the past four or five years, then?

And the programme will feature such outrageous footage, TV executives have are making preparations to ensure it is shown late at night.

... presumably by making it such a dull wander through previously exhausted material that the schedulers won't want it stinking up primetime?

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