I'M AFRAID THE MEN WITH THE CAMERAS MIGHT DAMAGE MY BABY'S SALEABILITY

Before you run away with a newfound respect for Britney Spears and the lengths she's going to keep her baby away from the snapping face of the paparazzi - hiring lookalike decoys (that'll keep Christina busy, then) and as many security as she usually uses on tour - it's not for the good of the baby.

Oh, no - Britney's just trying to preserve the value of the official photos of the bairn. Apparently, the US version of OK! is rumoured to have offered two million bucks for photos, but of course, if we already know what the kid looks like, that's going to be cut dramatically.

Having said which, we do know what the baby looks like - all babies look like Winston Churchill, although we suspect this 'un'll have a slightly more vacant stare.

The good news? Kevin Federline gets half, so he might be less keen on bothering with his rap career.
[None of this would be here without I Don't Like You In That Way]

music britney spears kevin federline