SHIRLEY BASSEY HATES RAP PEOPLE
On the basis that my enemy's enemy is my friend, Shirley Bassey should be expecting an invitation to the White House any day now, as she lays into Kanye West for "forgetting" to clear samples of Diamonds Are Forever for his Diamonds From Sierra Leone single. We've re-edited this quote from the Daily Mail to make it sound more authentic (by authentic, of course, we mean 'easier to read in a Matt Lucas doing his Shirley Bassey impression voice'):
"He didn't ask my permission to have me singing on his song, darling. Darling, I didn't even know it existed until I heard him performing at the Live 8 concert. I didn't even hear, darling, from his record company, which wasn't very nice, was it, darling? One way or another, he is going to have to pay me a lot of money."
It's unclear if Shirely would be willing to accept payment in diamonds, but we bet she would.
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