NOEL IS SICK OF IT ALL

Not simply because it's Christmas, we have a degree of sympathy for Noel Gallagher in his latest moan about how rotten his life is: the poor little thing is getting sick of Oasis:

"We finish touring in Mexico City, in March," says the 38-year-old Mancunian. "By that time, I'll be fucking sick of it and everybody in it. I'll be fucking sick of Liam and Gem and Andy and everyone. Sick of the songs, sick of singing The Importance Of Being Idle every night and it'll be like: 'Right. I'm off on holiday for six months!'"

Of course, you could just have written some songs with a bit more interest to them so they still felt fresh if you heard them more than twice, but we know how you feel. Do you think that six months holiday will be enough, though? Maybe you need a year or so?

We have to bring you the 3am Girl's punchline for this story, which we hope was written with just thirty seconds to press time:

Some Cigarettes and Alcohol to calm you down, sir?

What? What does that mean? Is that the best pun they could come up with based on an Oasis song? Why not "Yes, lay-laow for a while" or... no... can't fight...

music noel gallagher oasis