BONO CARICATURES GOD

Having already forgotten that he is a powerful, wealthy man, Bono now seems to have forgotten that he doesn't really have a hotline to God:

The U2 front man said it's unjust to keep poor people from selling their goods while singing the virtues of the free market, to hold children to ransom for the debts of their grandparents and to withhold medicines that would save lives.

"God will not accept that," he said. "Mine won't. Will yours?"

Hang about, Bono... since when did you know what God would or would not do? Is he now chatting with you in the way that he once did with Mary Whitehouse?

Excuse us, there's the phone... oh, it's God. He's ringing to ask us to give a message to Bono. He says "will you stop hanging out with the rich and the powerful and pretending you're some sort of latter-day Jesus; you're clearly to close to them to do any good, but because people see you there and don't realise you're part of the elite you make it seem like you're challenging, it makes them relax and think that things are being done. Oh, and that thing you did when you were thirteen with the girl's knickers and the cooking oil? That's still on the list, Hewson."

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