YOU KNOW WE WON'T COME LOOKING, MARTIN

Does anyone know of an abandoned cabin, miles from anywhere? It could be on an old minefield, or an area suffering from subsidence; electricity might be nice, but, to be honest, it'd be better without.

We've gone all Phil and Kirsty because we hear Coldplay are looking for a hideout miles from anywhere to record the next album:

Drummer Will Champion told NME: "We're trying to find somewherewe can set up and work.

"In all these years we haven't got an HQ, our own studio or anything like that. We want somewhere that we can sort of hole up and see what happens."

You heard the man - let's make his dream come true and wall up Coldplay and see what happens. (Wall-up; hole-up - it's all the same thing, isn't it?)

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