CANADA DECIDES IT CAN MUDDLE THROUGH WITHOUT FECAL CORPSE

Fecal Corpse, the New York band best known for We Gang-Banged Your Mom... Again have been forced to cancel two dates in Canada because Canada wouldn't let them in.

Apparently, when they turned up at the border and knocked, all of Canada hid behind a sofa hoping they'd think the country had gone away for the weekend, but someone sneezed and so that didn't work.

Luckily, Fecal Corpse had forgotten to get any work permits, so after six hours being questioned, they were sent back to New York.

Canadian metalfans are distraught, for who will now gang-bang their mothers? They've taken to the internet:

"Canada has let in other metal acts who were as sick and twisted," [one] wrote. "It's a real contradiction of my country."

We're not sure how that works - is there something in the Candian constitution which suggests its founded on the rights of corpses to be fecal?

"We should rally and stampede the border," Meat Grinder said. "You guys should be dropped from a helicopter."

Well, yes. That'd certainly solve a lot of the problems.

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