£1million? Jason says "That'll do"

We wondered what was making Jason Donovan's leg jitter like a caffeine addict locked in Starbucks during last night's National Lottery - now we know: he's signed a (supposed) million quid deal for his autobiography.

We suspect the payment will break down a little like this:

- My time in Neighbours: £2000
- That singing career: £200
- The true story of making a seemingly endless parade of films about Australian soldiers: £0.75
- Touring in the Rocky Horror Show: Done for free
- Suing The Face for calling me a liar: £9.25
- Accidently releasing my mobile number to the Australian public: £400
- I kissed that Kylie Minogue a few times: £997,390

Darius Perkins' autobiography is still up for grabs.