Thursday, July 12, 2007

Dave Mustaine is the John Bolton of hard rock

Dave Mustaine has written a song about the United Nations. A whole album, in fact.

It's not especially positive about the body - the cover, for example, features a plane flying into the UN building. Interesting. We wonder how many other buildings in New York someone could depict being the subject of a 9/11-style attack without, at the very least, Bill O'Reilly camping out on your doorstep, demanding you be swathed in orange dungarees and relocated to someowhere south of Florida.

Obviously, Mustaine isn't in control of his facts, and UN Dispatch takes great delight in wading through the spite to show that he's basing his distrust on misundestandings, half-truths, lies and ignorance. Oh, and some Book of Revelations stuff:

The threat is real, the Locust King has come
Don't tell me the truth; I don't like what they've done
It's payback time for the United Abominations

This is where things get weird. 'The Locust King' is drawn from the Book of Revelation, Chapter 9. Mustain's decision to use apocalyptic literature found in Revelation is quite, uh, revealing. He seems to be sympathetic to a fundamentalist doctrine known as pre-millenialism, in which an anti-Christ is said to rule the world during a period of tribulation before the messiah (Christ) returns. Some modern day pre-millenialist sects believe that the United Nations (or the Secretary General), is either literally the anti-Christ, or is setting the geopolitical conditions in which the anti-Christ will rise. Mustaine seems to believe this lunacy as well.

Iran funds Hamas, and attacked the US in the seventies, there was no stinking UN

I think Mustaine may be confusing Hamas for Hezbollah, the Iranian backed militant group in Lebanon. Agents of Hezbollah bombed US marine barracks in Beirut in 1983, when the United States and other international forces were part of a UN sanctioned mission to end the bloody Lebanese civil war. Mustaine may also be referring to the Iranian hostage crisis of 1979. In this case, obituaries of the recently deceased UN Secretary General Kurt Waldheim noted that securing the release of 14 Iranian-held American hostages in 1981 was one of the most significant achievements of his otherwise unremarkable tenure.

What has been Mustaine's reaction to being skewered?

Apparently, not knowing what he's talking about doesn't matter, as - if we've got this right - not blowing out his backtrumpet would infringe his Constitutional rights:
"I would rather feel right and be wrong with the semantics or facts in the song and have expressed my right to free speech, than to feel wrong and be right and sit back, like the rest of the cowards of the world, not saying anything."

Right, Dave. You don't think if you're going to issue a political statement it might be a good idea to at least check your facts first? Because speaking out against things that don't actually exist makes you look a little paranoid. And a lot like Richard Littlejohn.


7 comments:

simonsdaddy said...

dear simon go blow a goat dave mustaine puts his ass and music on the line everyday with some strong arguments and facts every day trying to inspire americas youth and all you do is kick back and badmouth it? your worthless dude

God said...

Dear Simon,

Wadido Baby Boo...now this nigga mr.mustaine gots some strong arguments ya dig...ye aints gots ta fuckin hate cause ya caynt play da geeetar...i agree witch yo fatha...go blowith a fuckin goat...you jus mad cause if u had a band itd be called big pile o faggots...now sir if ud please...Go suck a bag of dicks

SIMONSDADDYpart2 said...

dear uncle simon,
u HECKA suck, your probly canadian arent u.?1?!?!? fuckin canadians always got some gripe with the rest of the world cuz ur guyz's country HECKA sucks. damn french speaking red haired flap jack with maple syrup eatin moose fuckers. dave mustaine is our soon to be one day president of the united states of hypocracy and when he rules hes gunna put your weener suckin punk fuckin democrat pussy ass ina colombian neck tie n make u take a long walk off of a short pier...HOMO.. by the way for all my mexicanos bretheren out there....CHUPA UNA BOLSA DE PETOS..(TRANSLATION) SUCK A BAG OF DICKS!!!!!! u f'ing B

God Part2 said...

Listen here motherfucking Simon...thats right listen to yo pappy...Dsve Mustaine is hung like a fucking horse....no lie...im gonna get scientific on your ass...

Dave Mustaines Penis...

8===========================D

Simons Penis...

8==D

Now you see simon...you use these big fucking words to compromise for your widdle ass dick....you also hate on mustaine for using his balls because you lack fucking balls....except for the ones lodged in your throat...but il keep that on the low...wouldnt want your wife and kids knowing youb have a secret affair with your neighbors gardener....i will not stand for your canadian bullshit...do not make a mockery of mustaine AKA future President of the United States....your mad because your half french country lacks a president....the only thing worse than a frenchman is a dumb fuck ACTING like a frenchman...man ur a fucking wannabe french boy...fucking pathetic...

and in my closing statement....sucka da tippy o ma widdle ass dick tip ya dig

simon h b said...

If you'll forgive me, I'll construct a portmanteau reply to god and simonsdaddy's interesting macho, racist and barely coherent arguments:

1. British, not Canadian
2. Bi, actually, although I'm not entirely sure there's any link between sexuality and understanding of geopolitics
3. Dave Mustaine's penis might be enormous - although you neglect to mention if you're talking about fully erect or at rest - however, I'm unaware that penis size has ever been shown to help with the understanding of international relations
4. The way politics works is as a dialogue, not as a 'who can shout the loudest' contest; if Mustaine was serious about his views, he would welcome people engaging with them and taking them seriously enough to consider them...
5. ...however, as is clear, the facts upon which he's basing his singular viewpoints are incorrect which slightly undermines his whole argument.
6. It's interesting that - rather than counterarguing on the detail of Mustaine's debate, your idea of a counterpoint is 'go and suck a dick', as if that's a bad thing anyway.
7. 'A long walk off a short pier' - blimey, my Mum used to say that. Haven't heard that phrase in years.

M.C. Glammer said...

Dear Simon,
No wonder u h8 Dave Mustaine wen ur grammar is so good. Ur 2 eduk8ed 2 understand Mustaine's take on the world and stuff. U need 2 go blow a Mustaine messageboard! Those dudes r sum serious Mustaine-inspired muthafuckaz and that makes USA da fuckin' bomb. Yeah, guitar fuckin' solo, dudes, weeeeowwwwwwww!

simon h b said...

True, MC, but you have to respect their ASCII penis illustration skills...

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