The new Tom Jones album is, according to the pre-publicity, Tom Jones' most personal album ever.
Yes, it turns out that all along, he's only been singing songs that have been made up. Not a word of truth has he sang. He never really stabbed anyone to death, he isn't interested in a breakdown of developing items from a Pussycat, and frankly, he would much rather you took your hat off, thank you very much.
Now, though, he's decided to sing about things that mean something to him. You can tell, too:
Dressed all in black and standing motionless, his face lit by a solitary spotlight and lined with regret, he inhabits the skin of a dying man looking yearningly back over his life and wishing he’d done things differently.
Oh, oh, if only I'd noticed the sales for Johnny Cash's last album sooner...
It's a confusing time for all of us. Who better to guide us through this strange land than Gennaro Castaldo, of computer games retailer HMV? A totally different type of Tom Jones holding his hips steady and singing from the heart rather than a few inches south of it? Gennaro, what does it mean?
“Tom Jones albums always sell well in our stores, particularly, of course, in Wales,” he said.
“We have high expectations of this new album, and I’m sure his dedicated fans will be excited to hear it too.”
It will sell well in Wales and people who really like Tom Jones will want to hear it. Once again, Gennaro has shown a clear path through the wilderness.