I'm a cowboy, on a golf cart I ride/ I'm wanted, dead or alive

Bon Jovi are in big, big trouble: one of their entourage is alleged to have driven a golf cart over a woman during their Milton Keynes gig in 2006; now, Sally Allen is suing.

She wasn't even an audience member - she was part of the security team on an importangt task:

Mrs Allen, 37, was part of a cordon preventing back-stage access after a fire broke out in the VIP area.

A member of the US band's personal security team, Kevin McDonnell, drove up to her demanding access and allegedly said: "I don't care about your emergency situation. Get out of my way, you fucking whore."

Mr McDonnell, an American, is said to have added: "Do you know who I am? You can't fucking stop me."

Wow. It's bad when alleged celebrities pull the 'do you know what I am' line; when the jumped-up security detail driving round in a Rascal starts barking it, there's a serious problem.

Curiously, Thames Valley Police said they couldn't investigate the case because McDonnell "left the country" after the incident:

Det Sgt Chris Jackson, the investigating officer, said: "Once we had pursued all lines of enquiry that we could and established that he was abroad, we could not pursue the matter further.

"But if we found out that he was back in this country there is nothing to stop us arresting him and interviewing him about the alleged attack."

Given that the UK government is happy to deport people to America under any circumstances, and McDonnell had only gone to the US, rather than disappearing into the Amazon rainforest, this seems a little lame on the part of the Thames Valley Force. Still, heartening for criminals to know they can evade the British police by nothing more onerous than taking rooms in Manhattan.