Gordon in the morning: Pool feed

Interesting. Gordon returns once more to the Cole-Tweedy marriage, running a photo of Ashley Cole rubbing his eyes in a swimming pool.

To the casual observer, this looks like a bloke rubbing his eyes after swimming. But to Gordon, where everything is about one thing, it's bubbling with subtexts:

IT LOOKS like CHERYL COLE has finally got husband ASHLEY trained.

He was relaxing in the hotel pool ahead of the Chelsea v Inter Milan friendly in Pasadena, California, when two girls swam by for a chat.

He managed to cover his eyes with his hands to avoid looking at their bikini-clad bods - but maybe he was still taking a cheeky peek.

So not only has he managed to take a snapshot and put a whole different context on it, but he's loaded on a second possible context as well. Go, Gordon Smart.

Elsewhere, Gordon is applauding the Pussycat Dolls:

THE PUSSYCAT DOLLS have gone up in my estimation after racking up an £18,000 bar bill on a night out in London.

The Sun can never work out where it stands on alcohol, can it? The Pussycat Dolls piss away eighteen grand, and it's up in their estimation. If you're not famous, though, drinking too much is shameful and part of Britain being all broken.