For some reason, nobody at The Sun has deemed Gordon's story about Megan Fox playing Catwoman worthy of putting behind a "buy the paper" pay fence.
And I have a strong feline she is the purrfect choice for the part - and thanks to a spot of computer wizardry here's how she might look.
Even with cat puns (of the sort being made even while the Egyptians were first domesticating kittens) and somebody photoshopping a pair of rubber ears on Megan Fox?
Slipping into the famous PVC catsuit always looked like a tricky business to me.
This would be more a impressive observation, were it not slap bang under a picture of Halle Berry as Catwoman not wearing a PVC catsuit. Or a catsuit at all. Or PVC.
Elsewhere, Smart runs yet another non-story about JLS:
JLS have been given an official warning by their management company to curb their big spending.
This is accompanied by photo of one of them ordering some food at a McDonalds drive-through. Which, naturally, is the sort of place where the paparazzi usually hang out, and not somewhere a band's management would have to send their own photographer to. In the new pay-per-Smart future, when you read this sort of advertorial, I'm guessing you'll get cashback.