Wednesday, December 09, 2009

Gordon in the morning: Can 400,000 people be wrong?

You could almost feel sorry for Gordon this morning. Normally, his job is quite simple: you cheer for the popular, boo the unpopular, and effectively reflect back the reader's prejudices. Breasts? Hurrah! Druggies? Booooooo!

But what when approaching half a million people are organising to try and get Rage Against The Machine to block the X Factor number one?

The X Factor is popular.

But this is popular.

What side do you come down on?

Quick, Gordon. Can you find a way to have a pop at the BBC while you decide what to do?

On its release in February 1993 then Radio 1 DJ BRUNO BROOKES bungled by playing an uncensored version of it during his Top 40 countdown show.

The BBC were flooded by complaints from listeners stunned by the sheer volume of F-words the track contains.

Really? "Hello, BBC? I'm ringing to complain about the number of times the word 'fuck' was on the top 40. I wouldn't have minded a half dozen, maybe even ten, but this is just too many."

Still, Gordon has had some time to think: can you fudge your way out of this, not upsetting Cowell's PR team, while not appearing to side against a popular uprising?
I'm a huge fan of X Factor. It's a fantastic TV show which unites families around the box.

But it is a shame we've lost the traditional race for the festive No1.

I love you, Mr Cowell, but... oh, Christmas is a time for the kids, isn't it?
And Simon Cowell has picked MILEY CYRUS tune The Climb for the winner's song this year. It could be a WESTLIFE reject.

But I'm still betting that JOE McELDERRY will be the one releasing it.

... and that's the end of the piece. It's like he kind of forgot to come to a conclusion about the story he was actually writing and just switched back into X factor mode.

You've got to love the complaint that the song sounds like a Westlife reject, though - by the time it's gone through whatever sausage-meat-and-cosmetic unit gets to sing it, anything would sound like a Westlife reject. Look at the dead-fish song from last year.


6 comments:

Olive said...

Quite liked the headline, though.

NerysX said...

Yeah, we should all buy "Killing in the Name" and get it to No. 1 for Xmas instead of the X-Factor winner; that'd really stick it to the big music corporations like Sony Music Entertainment, who own the label that the X-Factor winners get signed to (Syco Records). Whereas Rage Against the Machine are signed to Epic records, which is a subsidiary of, er, Sony Music Entertainment...

H. said...

Is there not just a little bit of irony in the fact that people are being told to buy a song that says "Fuck you, I won't do what you tell me?"

Martin said...

I seem to remember reading in the NME, the week after Killing In The Name was played in the Top 40, that there were only about 80 complaints to the BBC. Maybe that constitutes a 'flood of complaints' in Gordon's world?

Anonymous said...

If this brings home anything, it is the undeniable fact that people are morons. Our Gordon's "It's a fantastic TV show which unites families around the box." is laughable, although obviously to be expected given the context of the family loving Sun. I think if you're all gathered around the box watching grown-ups verbally abusing vulnerable teens in a way I'd expect to see punished in the playground and find this acceptable behaviour, I'm worried for you.

The whole silly campaign thing, however, is something completely different. Oh no wait. It's just as stupid. As NerysX points out, much as the band have seemingly spent their entire career suggesting otherwise, RATM are a Sony band. A popular band on a major label. A pop band. As H. points out, this is completely contrary to the song. The main point of irritation though, is that for some reason people think the best way to solve the "problem" of predictable chart results and regain "the traditional race for the festive No1" is to fix it in another way and pick some arbitrary track that you're telling people is somehow artistically better than the other track (which at the moment doesn't even really have a singer). Couldn't these people spend their time actually trying to come up with something creative enough to outdo Cowell? I mean surely 400,000 people can come up with some idea that is better than "oh everybody jump on this bandwagon" or even better why not just accept how irrelevant the charts have become?

(On a more personal note, am I the only one who has always found Killing in the Name to be nothing more than irritating piece of juvenile nonsense? I mean I guess I agree with the sentiment but the song is just repetitive nonsense with a *giggle* swear word.)

Simon Hayes Budgen said...

I always enjoy telling the story of the time I saw a teenager wearing a 'Fuck You I Won't Do What You Tell Me' tshirt as his Mum sent him scurrying round Asda helping with the shopping.

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