Gordon splashes this morning on the terrible news that Brit nominees are turning down invites like they're "come to the disemboweling" requests:
Brit Busy That Night?
The idea of Earls Court being empty except for those stage-school kids they parachute down the front is an amusing one, but a caption on the photo illustrating the story makes it clear that we're not actually talking about that:
Possible no-show ... Dido
The 2010 Brits without Dido? Unimagimable! The last thing you need is the bar understaffed on a night like that.
Yes, the cards being returned are amongst those being invited for the anniversary category:
THERE could be an awkward moment next Tuesday night when the winner of the best Brits Album Of 30 Years is announced.
Acts including COLDPLAY, DIRE STRAITS and TRAVIS are nominated - but organisers are having a nightmare persuading any of them to turn up.
OASIS, KEANE, DUFFY, SADE and DIDO are also in the running but none of them have agreed to attend yet either.
Imagine that. It's almost as if the whole event is nothing more than a giant marketing opportunity that nobody would be arsed to attend if they had nothing to sell.
It's not all bad news, though:
PHIL COLLINS and THE VERVE's frontman RICHARD ASHCROFT will be there - but unless they win it could be a little embarrassing.
To be honest, if Phil Collins gets a prize for having made the best record out of all those released in the last thirty years, that might be a little bit more embarrassing than the recipient not being in the room.
But the chances of winning and prize and being on the television - surely that must be tempting?
Radio 2 listeners have already decided the outcome in a public vote and the winner will be announced on the night.
Hey, let's hope the lack of people picking up the invites isn't down to conversations along the lines of "did we win? But you must know... did we? did we? We didn't? Sorry, busy that night..."