Katy Perry says 'hands off Jesus'

Given that Katy Perry is the daughter of a hyper-Christian, she should have an interesting perspective on the use of church imagery in pop.

She doesn't, though.

Shortly after Lady GaGa did her rosary-swallowing video, Perry tweeted:

"Using blasphemy as entertainment is as cheap as a comedian telling a fart joke."

Ha! Yes, it's like doing a fart joke. Or, you know, a young pop singer throwing faux-lesbianism into a song in a bid to try and make good the shortcomings in her talent. That sort of thing.

Anyway, the jibe was obviously aimed at GaGa. Wasn't it?

"What's funny is that everybody was assuming I was directing it completely towards her, and if I was directing something I would write their '@,' " she told a French radio station. "Lately, I've just been seeing some things that are kind of like, I don't know, in my own personal feelings, a little bit like not something I would do, I guess."

Experts tell us that it looks like Perry had opened the oven of her mouth before the souffle of thoughts had finished cooking.

"Actually" clarified the experts, "looking again, it's more as if she's just thrown some eggs straight into the oven and hoped that somehow it might end up as a souffle. Metaphorically speaking."

But, you might be wondering, how can a please-buy-sexual throw stones? Perry has an answer to that:

"Yes, I said I kissed a girl. But I didn't say I kissed a girl while f---ing a crucifix."

I'm not sure you actually can fuck a crucifix. I suppose if it was large enough you might be able to do some sort of frottage. Or maybe Perry meant something along the lines of crucifix masturbation along the lines of The Exorcist. But she didn't do it. Because in her own personal feelings it's a little bit like something she wouldn't do, we guess.