Saturday, November 20, 2010

Gordon in the morning: Blunt solicitations

It says in the Bible "judge not, lest ye be judged". (Everytime I come across that line, it always sounds like Geraldine McEwan is saying it.) Cheryl Cole's just had an object lesson in that:

CHERYL Cole burst into floods of tears after a huge bust-up with British fashion guru Julien Macdonald.

The singer, 27, was left "sobbing and devastated" after the Next Top Model telly judge attacked her dress sense.
When judges clash. Thank god Gregg Wallace wasn't at the same party, or it could have turned into a devastating three way.

Elsewhere, James Blunt has mailed his friends to ask them to buy his album, which, funnily enough, is exactly the same model that most teenage garage bands use to try and boost sales of their CD-Rs into double figures.

Gordon has got hold of a copy of the email (so, clearly, not gone just to friends, then):
"Dear friends and friends of friends.

"My third album is out today. It's taken over a year to make and I promise it's got some really great songs on it.

"With a slightly cynical UK media, I am totally dependent on word of mouth, so I hope you don't mind me emailing you. You can buy it most easily at Tesco. Or order it online."
To be fair to Gordon, he does notice that it seems incredibly unlikely that Blunt has any friends who shop in Tesco, but he's more stung by the jibe at the media:
He's wrong to blame the "cynical UK media" for having to depend on word-of-mouth. He can't have read Bizarre recently - this is his second lead story in a week.
I'm not sure rushing to say 'hey, I'm not cynical, I keep pushing your crappy album' is that dignified a response, but given Blunt has turned up on Have I Got News For You and Buzzcocks - and nearly all papers unquestioningly ran the album promo story about how Blunt stopped the third world war from breaking out - "supine" might seem to be more apt than "cynical". And "totally dependent on word of mouth" would seem to be a massive porky.

In fact, it's not even true that it's easiest to buy it at Tesco, if you think about it.