Gordon in the morning: Jagger japes

Gordon Smart reports that Mick Jagger and David Bowie are working on a comedy movie.

Oddly, the only mention of David Bowie in the entire report is this:

The ROLLING STONES legend penned a script with the help of old pal DAVID BOWIE about a couple of hellraising rock'n'roll managers set in the mid-Sixties.

And then, despite a massive photo of Bowie, he's never mentioned again.

Perhaps he realised how awful the project sounded and bailed before the third paragraph.

Why, you might wonder, is Mick doing this? Gordon has an answer:

After watching old chart rivals SIR PAUL McCARTNEY and GEORGE MICHAEL send themselves up for Comic Relief, he thought it was finally time to get his Ha Ha's out.

Presumably if he'd tuned in for a different bit of Comic Relief, we'd be reading some half-formed mutterings about his plans to cook for the Prime Minister.

Apart from the Comic Relief thing being totally made up, when, exactly, were George Michael and Mick Jagger chart rivals?

There's an unnamed source, of course:

"He's well up for a cameo role, to show he's not the serious businessman a lot of people think he is all the time."

Yes, that's right. The first thing people think of when they hear the name "Mick Jagger" is "serious businessman". If only he could be a bit more like Victor Kiam.

Gordon ends with some advice:

I reckon he should put himself up for a SMITHY sketch for Sport Relief with JAMES CORDEN.

Even better if they throw in a few gags about his little fella.

Yes. There's nothing the world needs more than watching James Corden making jokes about Mick Jagger's wrinkly old friend. And then after doing the Keith Richards jokes, doing some about his cock.