So, as we've just heard, the Q Awards took place yesterday, organised by a 25 year-old magazine and, apparently, a panel of 70 year-old judges. In between the sniggering at how funny being gay is, they managed to give out some awards to the sort of people who appear on the covers of the magazine.
Here's the winners in full:
Best Act In The World Today presented by First Drinks Brand: ColdplayThe prize for Bon Iver is interesting; in this context it looks like the sort of CD someone would buy going to university to put on top of their pile in the hope that people might think them cooler than the rest of the bundle would suggest.
Greatest Act Of The Last 25 Years presented by BlackBerry: U2
Best Album: Bon Iver - Bon Iver
Q Best Male Artist presented by Merc: Tinie Tempah
Q Best Female Artist presented by Nivea Visage: Adele
Q Icon: Noel Gallagher
Q Classic Songwriter: Gary Barlow
Breakthrough Artist: Ed Sheeran
Best New Act presented by Orange Amplification: WU LYF
Q Innovation In Sound: Kaiser Chiefs
Q Inspiration presented by YouYou Mentoring: Fatboy Slim
Q Next Big Thing presented by Nivea Visage: Lana Del Ray
Best Track presented by Q Radio: Adele - Rolling In The Deep
Best Video presented by Q TV: Jessie J - Do It Like A Dude
Best Live Act: Biffy Clyro
Q Classic Song presented by Zippo: Snow Patrol - Chasing Cars
Q Outstanding Contribution To Music: Siouxsie Sioux
Q Hall Of Fame: Queen
More notable, though, is that there's a totally made-up category which seems to exist solely to give a prize to Snow Fucking Patrol for Chasing Cocking Cars. It seems that it's been sponsored by Zippo - Groucho, Harpo and Chico presumably wanted nothing to do with such a soiled rag.
To extend the Q-as-freshers-CD-pile, Chasing Cars would be the track they've packed in the hope that they might get a person they find sexually attractive back to their room.
Interesting that a prize sponsored by Blackberry was won by U2. I'm sure it's just a total coincidence, but it looks a little suspicious that the same company sponsors both the prize and the winner. Maybe that's the synergy we hear so much about.