Gordon in the morning: One's kid by our kid

Could there be an "angle" on the pregnancy of Mrs Cambridge that has been left untouched in the slew of non-stories over the last couple of days?

Oh, yes. Here's one: parenting advice from Noel Gallagher:

Noel, who ditched his hardcore party days years ago, said: “They’re not the first people in the country to have a child, are they?

“I’ve got three, you know. Do I have any advice for them? People write books about that s***. Very expensive books — my wife’s got ’em all.

“Tell William he’d be better thinking about rejoining the Army — he’d have a quieter life.”

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Interestingly, there is an increasing trend showing in Noel's "wit" that's started to appear since the Oasis gravy train smashed into the station wall. A lot of his jokes revolve around how much stuff is worth and how much money he could get for doing things - there was the guff about how Beady Eye playing Oasis catalogue earned him cash; now we've got a reluctance to give advice because you could sell that stuff. Maybe Noel's feeling the pinch.