Gordon in the morning: Liam threatens to quit

Liam Gallagher. Well known for writing verbal cheques that bounce, and I fear this one will prove equally valueless, but he's threatening to quit if... something:

He said: “If we’re barking up the wrong tree with this record, I don’t know if I can be ar*ed with barking up it again.

“I’ll never be a plumber, I’ll never be a fashion designer.

“Maybe I’d just sail off into the distance and enjoy my life, instead of worrying about what some spotty little t*** from Hastings thinks about the record.”

Oh, people's poet, don't die.

Happily for Liam, there's no actual description of what success would look like, and there's enough middle-aged Oasis fans who will be delighted with another chunk of more of the same to count BE as a glorious success.

And even if you look to sales, with Different Gear, Still Speeding, Do You See The Subtle DRUG References only managing to scrape to 140,000 copies in two years, even a mild retail success could be seen as a marvellous result.

Much as I'd love to see Liam exit, pursued by spoty youths from Hastings, I fear these words will merely be forgotten as he grimly ploughs on to the difficult third album.