Grammys 2014: Daft Punk get lucky

Emmylou Harris, Black Sabbath, Herb Alpert, Led Zeppelin. Nothing says "it's the 1970s" like the 2014 Grammy awards. Even Paul McCartney got a prize, for that Sound City project thing, which made a nice change from the bit of the ceremony which they banged on about The Beatles. Where they reunited The Beatles, or what's left of them. Oh, and The Beatles even got a prize, too. The Beatles.

Oh, sure, there's a few prizes given to Daft Punk, but really, more than ever, this year's Grammys was The Music Industry Nurtures The Artist Who Are At The Heart Of A Catalogue Business Strategy. (Effectively, a prize for Bruno Mars and Michael Buble is the same thing - if not artists who made records twenty years ago, then artists who could have made their records twenty years ago.)

Meanwhile, the long battle for the right to marry the person you love was reduced to a stunt at a music business jolly as Macklemore and Ryan Lewis wheeled in Madonna and Queen Latifah to rush through a Moonie-style mass wedding:

The weddings of 33 couples during the Grammy Awards were legally presided over by Queen Latifah. The rapper-actress-talk show host had to be sworn in as a commissioner by the state of California to perform the ceremony.
"You can call me Queen Commish for a little longer," she joked backstage Sunday night.

Latifah said she's not an ordained minister and her special powers expired at midnight.

"It was something I took very seriously," she said. "That is someone's life commitment to one another, you want to make sure you do it right. That's what sunk in for me."

Yeah. It's someone's life commitment, and how can you take that more seriously by having it squeezed in between Madonna's chorus, the network cutting to commercials and the prize for the least threatening R&B performance?

I know the intention was to be positive, and I know Macklemore and Lewis' song was at least about gender-blind marriage, but god, what a shitty, miserable little stunt; using people's love for each other to shore up an awards ceremony.

I guess we're lucky that the Grammys started a couple of years after Rosa Parks made her stand, otherwise we'd have had buses of all kinds of people being driven round and round the stage to demonstrate just how forward-thinking the horribly conservative music industry is.

Here are the winners in full from last night:

Album of the Year:
Daft Punk, Random Access Memories (Julian Casablancas, DJ Falcon, Todd Edwards, Chilly Gonzales, Giorgio Moroder, Panda Bear, Nile Rodgers, Paul Williams & Pharrell Williams, featured artists; Thomas Bangalter, Julian Casablancas, Guy-Manuel De Homem-Christo, DJ Falcon & Todd Edwards, producers; Peter Franco, Mick Guzauski, Florian Lagatta, Guillaume Le Braz & Daniel Lerner, engineers/mixers; Antoine "Chab" Chabert & Bob Ludwig, mastering engineers)

Record of the Year:
Daft Punk, "Get Lucky" (Thomas Bangalter & Guy-Manuel De Homem-Christo, producers; Peter Franco, Mick Guzauski, Florian Lagatta & Daniel Lerner, engineers/mixers; Antoine "Chab" Chabert & Bob Ludwig, mastering engineers)

Song of the Year:
Lorde, "Royals" (Joel Little & Ella Yelich O'Connor, songwriters)

Best Country Album:
Kacey Musgraves, Same Trailer Different Park

Best Pop Vocal Album:
Bruno Mars, Unorthodox Jukebox

Best Rap/Sung Collaboration:
Jay Z Featuring Justin Timberlake, "Holy Grail"

Best Pop Solo Performance:
Lorde, "Royals"

Best Rock Song:
Dave Grohl, Paul McCartney, Krist Novoselic, and Pat Smear, "Cut Me Some Slack"

Best Pop Duo/Group Performance:
Daft Punk Featuring Pharrell Williams and Nile Rodgers, "Get Lucky"

Best New Artist:
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis

Best Rock Album:
Led Zeppelin, Celebration Day

Best Metal Performance:
Black Sabbath, "God Is Dead?"

Producer of the Year, Non-Classical:
Pharrell Williams

Best Alternative Music Album:
Vampire Weekend, Modern Vampires of the City

Best Rock Performance:
Imagine Dragons, "Radioactive"

Best Country Song:
Kacey Musgraves, "Merry Go 'Round" (Shane McAnally, Kacey Musgraves and Josh Osborne)

Best Country Solo Performance:
Darius Rucker, "Wagon Wheel"

Best Country Duo/Group Performance:
the Civil Wars, "From This Valley"

Best Music Film:
Paul McCartney, Live Kisses (Jonas Åkerlund, video director; Violaine Etienne, Aron Levine and Scott Rodger, video producers)

Best Music Video:
Justin Timberlake Featuring Jay Z, "Suit and Tie" (David Fincher, video director; Timory King, video producer)

Best Blues Album:
Ben Harper With Charlie Musselwhite, Get Up!

Best R&B Album:
Alicia Keys, Girl on Fire

Best Urban Contemporary Album:
Rihanna, Unapologetic

Best R&B Song:
Justin Timberlake, "Pusher Love Girl" (James Fauntleroy, Jerome Harmon, Timothy Mosley and Justin Timberlake, songwriters)

Best Traditional R&B Performance:
Gary Clark, Jr., "Please Come Home"

Best R&B Performance:
Snarky Puppy With Lalah Hathaway, "Something"

Best Pop Instrumental Album:
Herb Alpert, Steppin' Out

Best Dance Recording:
Zedd Featuring Foxes, "Clarity"

Best Dance/Electronica Album:
Daft Punk, Random Access Memories

Best Rap Performance:
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis Featuring Wanz, "Thrift Shop"

Best Rap Song:
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis Featuring Wanz, "Thrift Shop" (Ben Haggerty and Ryan Lewis, songwriters)

Best Rap Album:
Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, the Heist

Best Traditional Pop Vocal Album:
Michael Bublé, to Be Loved

Best New Age Album:
Laura Sullivan, Love's River

Best Improvised Jazz Solo:
Wayne Shorter, "Orbits"

Best Jazz Vocal Album:
Gregory Porter, Liquid Spirit

Best Jazz Instrumental Album:
Terri Lyne Carrington, Money Jungle: Provocative in Blue

Best Large Jazz Ensemble Album:
Randy Brecker, Wlodek Pawlik Trio and Kalisz Philharmonic, Night in Calisia

Best Latin Jazz Album:
Paquito D'Rivera and Trio Corrente, Song for Maura

Best Gospel/Contemporary Christian Music Performance:
Tasha Cobbs, Break Every Chain

Best Gospel Song:
Tye Tribbett, "If He Did It Before . . . Same God"

Best Contemporary Christian Music Song:
Mandisa, "Overcomer" (David Garcia, Ben Glover and Christopher Stevens, songwriters)

Best Gospel Album:
Tye Tribbett, Greater Than

Best Contemporary Christian Music Album:
Mandisa, Overcomer

Best Latin Pop Album:
Draco Rosa, Vida

Best Latin Rock, Urban or Alternative Album:
La Santa Cecilia, Treinta Días

Best Regional Mexican Music Album (Including Tejano):
Mariachi Divas De Cindy Shea, A Mi Manera

Best Tropical Latin Album:
Pacific Mambo Orchestra, Pacific Mambo Orchestra

Best American Roots Song:
Steve Martin and Edie Brickell, "Love Has Come for You" (Edie Brickell and Steve Martin, songwriters)

Best Americana Album:
Emmylou Harris and Rodney Crowell, Old Yellow Moon

Best Bluegrass Album:
Del McCoury Band, The Streets of Baltimore

Best Reggae Album:
Ziggy Marley, Ziggy Marley in Concert

Best World Music Album:
Gipsy Kings, Savor Flamenco (tie)

Ladysmith Black Mambazo, Live: Singing for Peace Around the World (tie)

Best Folk Album:
Guy Clark, My Favorite Picture of You

Best Regional Roots Music Album:
Terrance Simien and the Zydeco Experience, Dockside Sessions

Best Children's Album:
Jennifer Gasoi, Throw A Penny In the Wishing Well

Best Spoken Word Album (Includes Poetry, Audio Books and Storytelling):
Stephen Colbert, America Again: Re-becoming the Greatness We Never Weren't

Best Comedy Album:
Kathy Griffin, Calm Down Gurrl

Best Musical theater Album:
Kinky Boots

Best Compilation Soundtrack for Visual Media:
Sound City: Real to Reel

Best Score Soundtrack for Visual Media:
Skyfall, Thomas Newman, composer

Best Song Written for Visual Media:
Adele, "Skyfall" (Adele Adkins and Paul Epworth, songwriters)

Best Instrumental Composition:
the Clare Fischer Orchestra, "Pensamientos for Solo Alto Saxophone and Chamber Orchestra" (Clare Fischer, composer)

Best Instrumental Arrangement:
Gordon Goodwin's Big Phat Band, "on Green Dolphin Street" (Gordon Goodwin, arranger)

Best Instrumental Arrangement Accompanying Vocalist(s):
Bobby McFerrin and Esperanza Spalding, "Swing Low" (Gil Goldstein, arranger)

Best Recording Package:
Reckless Kelly, Long Night Moon (Sarah Dodds and Shauna Dodds, art directors)

Best Boxed or Special Limited Edition Package:
Paul McCartney and Wings, Wings Over America (Deluxe Edition) (Simon Earith and James Musgrave, art directors)

Best Album Notes:
John Coltrane, Afro Blue Impressions (Remastered and Expanded) (Neil Tesser, album notes writer)

Best Historical Album:
the Rolling Stones, Charlie Is My Darling - Ireland 1965 (Teri Landi, andrew Loog Oldham and Steve Rosenthal, compilation producers; Bob Ludwig, mastering engineer) (tie)

Bill Withers, the Complete Sussex and Columbia Albums (Leo Sacks, compilation producer; Joseph M. Palmaccio, tom Ruff and Mark Wilder, mastering engineers)

Best Engineered Album, Non-Classical:
Daft Punk, Random Access Memories (Peter Franco, Mick Guzauski, Florian Lagatta and Daniel Lerner, engineers; Bob Ludwig, mastering engineer)

Best Remixed Recording, Non-Classical:
Lana Del Rey, "Summertime Sadness (Cedric Gervais Remix) (Cedric Gervais, Remixer)

Best Surround Sound Album:
Paul McCartney, Live Kisses (Al Schmitt, surround mix engineer; tommy LiPuma, surround producer)

Best Engineered Album, Classical:
Dawn Upshaw, Maria Schneider, Australian Chamber Orchestra and St. Paul Chamber Orchestra, Winter Morning Walks (David Frost, Brian Losch and Tim Martyn, engineers; Tim Martyn, mastering engineer)

Producer of the Year, Classical:
David Frost

Best Orchestral Performance:
Minnesota Orchestra, Sibelius: Symphonies Nos. 1 and 4 (Osmo Vänskä, conductor)

Best Opera Recording:
the Metropolitan Opera Orchestra; the Metropolitan Opera Chorus, Adès: the Tempest (Thomas Adès, conductor; Simon Keenlyside, Isabel Leonard, Audrey Luna and Alan Oke; Luisa Bricetti and Victoria Warivonchick, producers)

Best Choral Performance:
Tui Hirv and Rainer Vilu; Estonian Philharmonic Chamber Choir; Sinfonietta Riga and Tallinn Chamber Orchestra; Latvian Radio Choir and Vox Clamantis, Pärt: Adam's Lament (Tõnu Kaljuste, conductor)

Best Chamber Music/Small Ensemble Performance:
Brad Wells and Roomful of Teeth, Roomful Of Teeth

Best Classical Instrumental Solo:
Albany Symphony, Corigliano: Conjurer - Concerto for Percussionist and String Orchestra (Evelyn Glennie; David Alan Miller, conductor)

Best Classical Vocal Solo:
Maria Schneider; Jay anderson, Frank Kimbrough and Scott Robinson; Australian Chamber Orchestra and St. Paul Chamber Orchestra, Winter Morning Walks (Dawn Upshaw)

Best Classical Compendium:
Hindemith: Violinkonzert; Symphonic Metamorphosis; Konzertmusik, Christoph Eschenbach, conductor

Best Contemporary Classical Composition:
Schneider, Maria: Winter Morning Walks, Maria Schneider, composer (Dawn Upshaw, Jay anderson, Frank Kimbrough, Scott Robinson and Australian Chamber Orchestra)

Still, at least Stephen Colbert won.