And she took the full six... no, wait, nine inches

Is it just us, or does the tale of Fred Durst's My Night With Britney [manfully typed in full by the good folk at Playlouder] sound less like something that actually happened, and more like the reader's letters section of Penthouse? "She came back at three am wearing a see-through blouse and I could see her nipples." It's actually the sort of thing you'd not be surprised one of the teenie virgins in S Club to come up with, not a fully-grown man in his forties: 'you could see her boobies and everything.'

But Mr. Louder, you are spoiling us

The Playlouder singles club is known throughout society for its high quality downloads of tip top tunes. But as they prepare for the first ever PlayLouder festival at the ICA, they have just gone nuts. Alec Empire, K, 80s Matchbox B Line Disaster...