Tuesday, January 03, 2006

GIVE US BACK OUR SHOES

If you had to hand over your mobile phone, some money and your shoes to Pete Doherty, before being driven round London so you didn't know where you were, you might assume he was mugging you. Actually, it turns out that you'd have been invited to his New Year's Eve party.

That's right, he charged his guests ten quid to get in and took their shoes from them; into the bargain, he drove them round and round wearing blindfolds so they wouldn't be able to tell whereabouts in North London he lived - which must have been a pain for the taxi drivers coming to pick them up as the evening wound down. We love the idea that Pete thinks he lives at a secret address, mind, known only to him, half the showbiz hacks in London, Scabby Kenny the dealer and most of the North London underworld. And any of his guests who looked out the window.

Meanwhile, the diligent work of the British tabloids has uncovered information about the new kid in Kate Moss' life - you'll recall she was spotted nuzzling. He's a posh kid who wants to be thought of as a bad boy singer-songwriter. So, a complete change of pace for Kate, there, then.

Actually, the Charterhouse boy (what's the correct term for somebody who went to Charterhouse? No, no, we don't mean the four-letter word, we mean is it something like Old Chahoovian or something?) might not be in the same league at all, according to his old classmates:

"Jamie always liked to think of himself as a bit of a bad boy at school. He kept getting caught smoking when he shouldn't have been and thought he was a bit cool."

He never used to spark up outside the Prep Room, did he? Blimey. We hope the Mirror doesn't get hold of video of the time he gave Strangely Brown an apple-pie bed.

Friends insist this isn't a serious romance, as Kate has said she'd quite like to be introduced to Winker Watson next.


3 comments:

thensheappeared said...

Get a load of this quote:
A source said last night: “Kate finds Jamie very sexy. He has that rock ’n’ roll look she loves. And it makes her feel good that she can pull a 20-year-old.”

For goodness sake. She's 31, she's the world's most famous and presumably one of the wealthiest supermodels (unless Pete spent it all), she's stunningly attractive in a scary way. Why are they making her sound like Baby Jane? How much lassooing did Tim Nice But Dim need anyway?

Menders said...

It's 'old Carthusian'. Like the monks, but far cuntier.

adhe donat said...


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