Weather saves Kevin Federline from himself

Kevin Federline had been due to perform a moonwalk in an inflatable deodorant tin - accompanied, of course, by scantily-clad women - but the idea had to be scrapped because of high winds.

There, but for the grace of God. Assuming there's a God that controls the weather. Or maybe it was just passers-by blowing to try and stop it happening.

Kevin, if you're that desperate for money, please consider gay porn. Compared to "moonwalking with the Axe babes in an inflatable", you'll discover the dignity of proper labour.